“Betty helps you understand the spirit of this document and the impact it will have on your child’s continued success and happiness.” – Marilyn Mathewson, Parent, Colorado Independent Futures
You are the expert when it comes to your child. You know their likes, dislikes, tolerance levels, routines, diet, medications and a hundred other details that successfully get them through the day.
So, what if you were unable to act for your child? What if today was your last day? Have you written down everything you know so that someone could step into your shoes as caretaker or decision-maker with minimal disruption to your child’s routine? Do your child's guardians, trustees, siblings, and team of natural supports know each other and what to do if you were no longer available? Additionally, have you documented your wishes for your child related to critical areas such as:
Independence and self-determination - making their own choices
Financial well-being
Quality of life - social and recreational opportunities
Housing - where will they live if they can't live with you?
Education
Employment
Safety
Access to community
Access to health care
You have to be your child’s advocate, even upon your death. The natural question is: where do I begin?
Your wills and trust and financial plans do not tell your successors what makes your child happy, feel safe, feel loved. How do you set boundaries, explain social rules, redirect them to a better choice? Even those who know your child want your guidance when it comes to significant decisions, as well as the best way to comfort them during times of sorrow. Trustees want to know how you would like their money managed. Successor guardians want your advice on every aspect of your child's life – for now and the future.
Discuss various “what if” life scenarios and opportunties that may impact what you want to say;
Bring out the philosophies you have developed as their parent about what is in your child's best interests;
Remind you that this is a “living document” that grows and changes with your child;
Move completion of this vital document from your "To Do" to your "Done!" list.
As your coach, I will be your guide and give you the gentle, but regular, supportive nudge that most of us need to get such an emotionally charged and highly detailed document completed. I will also make sure that it remains a living, useful document by encouraging you to update it at least every two years.
For your intentions to become your child's reality if you cannot act on their behalf, please contact me to bring your Special Directions to life.
